You're just a face with no name.

It's been forever since I've written in this damn blog. I've always struggled with this blog and for good measure, I hate talking about myself. Truthfully, I've always struggled with racing and trying to "go pro" or "taking it to the next level". Let's be honest, racing is selfish. Training is selfish. I have definitely fallen victim of putting my racing and training above all other things in my life. Most people, and a lot of these my friends, family and supporters are proud to see me take action, take chances and live life to the fullest. I had an overwhelming amount of support in my move to Colorado now nearly 2 years ago. I'm just not so sure I really care about being THE fast guy anymore. It quickly started to fade while living in Colorado, riding and having huge all day adventures on the bike rapidly became more fun than racing.



I was simply enjoying experiencing new things, things a kid from Mobile, Al would never dream of exploring. I even wanted to pursue road racing and ended up without a road bike and only owning a mountain bike for a year. It's crazy to think how quickly things can change so fast. Without risks and opportunities taken, what will we ever learn about ourselves? I learned I have lacked a major sense of balance in my life. I was blind to most anything aside from cycling. I haven't raced since Nov 22 this past Fall, and trust me, the burning desire to toe the line is in me like the brightest fire. On the other hand, I'm happy off of my bike for the first time in years. I am happy working, I'm not losing my shit if I only ride an 8 hour week. I am enjoying my company of friends and family like never before. I am no longer living for the next big adventure as if it is the blood to my existence. I have always been a black and white kind of thinker. There is a reason most elite athletes are type A personalities, I have never claimed to be one of those, but I do see things in very little grey, it is or it isn't. For the first time since I decided I wanted to be the fastest guy around on my bike, I am living my life with grey, and it has never felt so good. Letting go of the desire and motivation to constantly ride, because I will admit it, for the longest time riding was an unhealthy addicition, and that's not easy to say. I often think if I will ever be able to shake the craving for riding 30 hour weeks. Or will I now enjoy and appreciate my life all the more on the days and times spent when I am out for 100 mile rides.